What if...

I was talking to my friend this morning and he kept asking me about stupid "What if" questions, like,

1)"What if, you were adopted?"

2)"What if, the sky fell down?"

3)"What if, you were a monkey?"

4)"What if, I broke your phone?"

5)"What if, your dog walked you?"

6)"What if, I was a wizard?"

7)"What if, I was a wizard without a beard?"

Now, I never get really annoyed when people do stupid stuff so I decided to play along with it. This is how I answered him,

1) then I would try to find my missing parents.

2) the I hope God hold's it up again

3) then I would fling poo at you

4) now this one turned out to be true, so, I hope there's a hospital near by...

5) then I would do my business on your lawn because of number 4

6) please, everyone knows to be a wizard you have to have a beard, and you barely have armpit hair.

7) that's stupid