WARNING! CHILDREN LEFT ATTENDED WILL BE SOLD TO THE CIRCUS.
You know, what if some parent left their kid and they found him at the circus 10 years later. Their conversation might be something like this...
Kid who got sold to the circus: "Hi Mom!"
Mom who lost her son: "Billy?!? Is that you?!?"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "Yea it's me Mom. Remember when you totally ignored me and the giant sign that said if you left me, I'll get sold to the circus?
Mom who lost her son: "Yes, but how did you get here?"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "I just told you, you left me, and the people at the company sold me to the circus."
Mom who lost her son: "Yes yes, I get all of that, but who are you?"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "YOU JUST CALLED ME BILLY! I AM YOUR SON!"
Mom who lost her son: "Billy! Is that you?!?!"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "YES!!!!!!"
Mom who lost her son: "But how did you get here?"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING? I JUST SAID, YOU LEFT ME, AND I GOT SOLD TO THE CIRCUS!"
Mom who lost her son: "Can I just tell you one simple thing?"
Kid who got sold to the circus: "FINE, WHAT IS IT NOW?"
Mom who lost her son: "My son's name is Jeremy."
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Well time for work!
Last time the post was about a movie mistake. This time the post is about a funnier movie mistake.
From the scene we can see that "Master" is a little more modern than we thought.
This is probably his day job, and in the night he probably runs a bigger business. I wonder how the scene turned out.
Young apprentice: "Master! Master! I need you to teach me in the sacred art of Kung Fu!"
Master: "To be a Kung Fu warrior you must first learn how to---Brrrriiiinnnggg!"
Young apprentice: "Master, what was that sound? It sounded so inhuman!"
Master: "Oh, don't worry, it's just a self-adjusting portable hand alarm."
Young apprentice: "A self-who's a what?!?!?"
Master: "It means it's time to go to my night-time job, a CEO!"
Young apprentice: "But Master, how will I learn the way's of---"
Master: "Hold that thought, someone's calling me"
Young apprentice: "You have a cellphone!"
Master: "A Blackberry, I was going to get the i-phone, but then I decided not to."
Young apprentice: "But---"
Master: starts talking in his cellphone, "Hey Jerry! No, of course this isn't a bad time. Yea, I can do that. Don't worry, I don't have a busy schedule, yea, I got ton's of free time. K' bye."
Young apprentice: "Ummm...master?
Master: "Sorry kid, I gotta go."
Young apprentice: "But who will teach me the ancient art of Kung Fu!"
Master: "Here's my card, call my secretary, Janet, she'll tell you everything you need to know about---"
Young apprentice: "Kung Fu!"
Master: "Uhhhh.....no, in making a appointment." Master takes off Kung Fu costume, and reveals a black suit he was wearing underneath. Then he walks away.
From the scene we can see that "Master" is a little more modern than we thought.
This is probably his day job, and in the night he probably runs a bigger business. I wonder how the scene turned out.
Young apprentice: "Master! Master! I need you to teach me in the sacred art of Kung Fu!"
Master: "To be a Kung Fu warrior you must first learn how to---Brrrriiiinnnggg!"
Young apprentice: "Master, what was that sound? It sounded so inhuman!"
Master: "Oh, don't worry, it's just a self-adjusting portable hand alarm."
Young apprentice: "A self-who's a what?!?!?"
Master: "It means it's time to go to my night-time job, a CEO!"
Young apprentice: "But Master, how will I learn the way's of---"
Master: "Hold that thought, someone's calling me"
Young apprentice: "You have a cellphone!"
Master: "A Blackberry, I was going to get the i-phone, but then I decided not to."
Young apprentice: "But---"
Master: starts talking in his cellphone, "Hey Jerry! No, of course this isn't a bad time. Yea, I can do that. Don't worry, I don't have a busy schedule, yea, I got ton's of free time. K' bye."
Young apprentice: "Ummm...master?
Master: "Sorry kid, I gotta go."
Young apprentice: "But who will teach me the ancient art of Kung Fu!"
Master: "Here's my card, call my secretary, Janet, she'll tell you everything you need to know about---"
Young apprentice: "Kung Fu!"
Master: "Uhhhh.....no, in making a appointment." Master takes off Kung Fu costume, and reveals a black suit he was wearing underneath. Then he walks away.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Hey...uhhh, you might wanna put your hand on the trigger
Now, if you haven't noticed anything from the picture yet, even though there's a red circle pointing it out. I'll tell you what it is, the police officer doesn't have his hand on the trigger, in fact none of the police officers do. These guys are just standing around, looking really serious and clearly they haven't figured out how to use a gun. I wonder how the scene would be like?
Police officer: "Put your hands up!"
Robber: "Uhhh.. officer you might wanna put your hands on the gun."
Police officer: "Excuse me?!? Is that how you speak to a police officer? I don't tell you how to do your job, do I?
Robber: "No....you arrest me for it."
Police officer: "If you don't listen, and do what I say, i'll shoot!"
Robber: "Hmmm...should I listen to an officer who doesn't know how to use a gun or run away, I think i'll go with choice 2."
Police officer: "I warned you" officer squeezes handle, nothing happens."Cheap quality, must be broken" throws gun away.
Police officer: "Put your hands up!"
Robber: "Uhhh.. officer you might wanna put your hands on the gun."
Police officer: "Excuse me?!? Is that how you speak to a police officer? I don't tell you how to do your job, do I?
Robber: "No....you arrest me for it."
Police officer: "If you don't listen, and do what I say, i'll shoot!"
Robber: "Hmmm...should I listen to an officer who doesn't know how to use a gun or run away, I think i'll go with choice 2."
Police officer: "I warned you" officer squeezes handle, nothing happens."Cheap quality, must be broken" throws gun away.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Hellboy
Hey guys, I know I haven't posted anything for 2 days, but there's a long story behind that, and I mean like my "list of presents for Christmas" long. So, let's just skip the apologies and get straight to the action.
"That's great sweetie"! Yea....I don't think so.
It was sunday night and I was watching Hell Boy 2, the movie overall, was pretty cool and the graphics were even better. The only problem I had was the name of the main guy. So, in the movie everyone hate's Hellboy, well here's an idea CHANGE YOUR NAME. I mean seriouly, if you're stuck with a name like Hellboy, you're not gonna expect a lot of people thanking you. How many times do you see a superhero with a name like that "Hellboy".
"It's a bird, it's a plane, it's Hellboy!". What a way to incourage little kids,
"Mommy, mommy look, I am Hellboy"! What would the mother say?
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Problem with the zoo
I went to the zoo a couple years back for a field trip and it was pretty disappointing. So, I decided to write about it.
Now, don't get me wrong some zoo's are awesome, but the one I went to wasn't. First of all, there were no animals! Every single exhibit we went to, there was nothing there and our guide kept telling us that the animal was in some bush or sleeping. Finally, we got to the owl section and guess what, there was no owl. The cage didn't have any bushes and you could see inside it's sleeping area so the guide didn't have any other excuse. You know what she told us? It's dead. You know, I would have believed her if she at least had some sad facial expression when she said it, but no, she was smiling and cheerful.
That was problem number one. The second thing was that there was a horrible smell everywhere we went. I really don't know how that happened since there were no animals...wait that could have been my teacher...
Well that solves that problem.
Stupid Laws
The law was that 30% of a radio station’s content must be "Canadian Content". Now, I don't know about you but I really don't know what Canadian content is. Do you talk about something normal and then just randomly say something Canadian that has nothing to do with your topic?
"This is Double D on the radio telling you about today's news, a bus has just crashed in Wisconsin, thankfully no one was hurt, but the Canadian syrup is looking better than ever. Eh?!
Yea...that will certainly get a lot of people listening to this guy.
You know, what if someone gets confused and he doesn't know what 30% exactly is so he just starts saying "eh" after every 5 words.
"The song for you today, eh, is the new hit,eh, that broke records for,eh,"
Or even worse, the guy just starts shouting something Canadian every 5 seconds!
"Hey Syrup, guess what cold it is, cause it is Stephen Harper time!"......Well, the only thing to do now is watch more T.V.
Friday, March 25, 2011
The mystery of RASPUTIN!
Hey guys, I know I haven't posted anything today for a while so i'll make this one extra awesome. Now, this handsom looking fellow is the mad monk, RASPUTIN,(creepy music turns on, and lightning flashes in the background). I am sure all of you have heard of his relationship with ANASTASIA, and him cursing their whole family and the princess survives and workes in your local TimHortons blah, blah, blah.But, did you know that no one is really sure on how this coocoo bird dies. They're have been many legends about how he dies but their is one legend that is the freakiest and coolest one yet. Here's how it goes, Rasputin was led to a cellar by some men and in the cellar he was fed cakes and red wine that were laced with poison. According to the legend the poison had no effect on him. Seeing that the poison did nothing, one of the men shot Rasputin in the back with a revolver. But Rasputin still didn't die, and he jumped on the man who shot him and tried to strangle him. The other men saw what Rasputin was doing and shot him again 3 times in the back.When the men moved closer to the body they saw that Rasputin was still trying to get up! Then the men clubbed rasputin into commision, binded his body, wrapped him up in a carpet and threw him in a icy river called "Neva River". Rasputin was finally dead. But the freaky part is when they found the body, his arms were in a upright position, as if he was trying to claw his way out of the ice....
Well, that's just a legend and the a pretty short version of it, if you want to read the extended version, click this link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grigori_Rasputin.
What do you think really happened on the day of Rasputin's death?
Well, that's just a legend and the a pretty short version of it, if you want to read the extended version, click this link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grigori_Rasputin.
What do you think really happened on the day of Rasputin's death?
Thursday, March 24, 2011
"Hey you! No fishing in the toilet!"
Hey guys, so I was searching on the web and I found this sign.
Ummm...ok then. The people who put up that sign must think some people are really stupid. I mean who will try to pee like a dog, you know what if a dog walked into that bathroom, what would he think? And what if he somehow read those rules, what would someone else think if they walked in?
They wouldn't be like,
Notice that there's actually one" wrong" sign of fishing in the toilet, what exactly is that guy fishing for?You know maybe there is some idiot who fishes in a toilet, I wonder what he would say when he sees that sign.
"What!?!Darn it, how am I supposed to hunt for lunch now" or maybe it would be something like this,
"C'mon Nemo, I know you're in there somewhere!"
Y'know they should have also added one wrong one of some guy in the thinker position.
"Don't think, just do"
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Words of Wisdom
Today I will give you sacred words of wisdom.NEVER EAT A RED CHILI!
Yesterday, I decided to be stupid and eat a huge red chili, I'll walk you through on what happened,
At first="So what, it's a red chili, I've eaten spicier things."
Then some more insults at the chili="Chili, you're going down!"
A couple more="What's the big, bad chili gonna do?"
I take a big bite.
And then="WATER!, WATER!"
I run around in circles, then I gulp down an entire jug of water.
After that:"I NEED SOMETHING SWEET, I NEED SOMETHING SWEET"
I bump my head on the wall and start screaming="AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!THAT HURT!
Then I sit down and say="It wasn't that bad."and I start the process again.
SPIES! part 3
The first post of the day and this is the end of the SPIES series. James bond proved to all of us that all you needed to be a spy was a cool suit, a gun and computer graphics but a real famous spy was RICHARD SORGE. This guy was a spy for the Soviet Union. He was a really famous because of his skills in espionage. Richard was a journalist in Germany and Japan and using that job he went to various places to complete his missions, he was eventually caught and hanged in Japan. Now, in the picture Sorge look's really focuse for some reason. Maybe he's thinking of a spy plan...... or maybe he's just let out some gas.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
SPIES! part 2
Hey guys, this is the second part of the first part of SPIES!...no wait it's the first second part of the first one...Never mind, today's lucky spy gadget is the DISAPPEARING INK PEN OF DOOM! Well, not of DOOM but it's still a disappearing ink pen. Whatever you write with this thing will disappear in about 48 hours, so don't write your homework with this. If you do you'll end up with a excuse like this,
"Sorry miss, my Disappearing ink pen made it disappear". Good luck trying to convince your parents!
Now since I did a Disappearing ink pen before, it was only common sense to do Self Destructing Paper next. Kinda, ironic I found them both on this website http://www.pimall.com/nais/gad.html. Anyway, this spy paper completely dissolves in just seconds when contacted with water, and the good thing is that it looks like ordinary paper so no one will know the difference. Once again, don't do your homework on this, especially not with the Disappearing Ink Pen.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Strawberries made with apples (the title say's it all, literally)
Get your ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED STRAYBERRY'S HERE! THEY'RE MADE WITH REAL APPLES!
Now at first when I saw this on this website,
http://www.womples.com/
I thought it was some kind of joke but apparently it isn't.
What I am wondering is what the customers would say when they see this.
"Hey, honey I found some strawberries made with apples!"
Now that would be akward. You know, maybe the company ran out of ingrediants to put in their mixture. I wonder how they're conversation would be like.
"Hey boss, the strawberries are all out"
"What!?!We have to put in at least 50 of them in the mixture"
"I got some apples"
Boss remains silent for a while.
"Eh, what the heck, put em' in their!"
Well, I guess you can count on their honesty.
Now at first when I saw this on this website,
http://www.womples.com/
I thought it was some kind of joke but apparently it isn't.
What I am wondering is what the customers would say when they see this.
"Hey, honey I found some strawberries made with apples!"
Now that would be akward. You know, maybe the company ran out of ingrediants to put in their mixture. I wonder how they're conversation would be like.
"Hey boss, the strawberries are all out"
"What!?!We have to put in at least 50 of them in the mixture"
"I got some apples"
Boss remains silent for a while.
"Eh, what the heck, put em' in their!"
Well, I guess you can count on their honesty.
SPIES! part 1
Hey guys, winter's almost gone and it's spring where flower's are blooming and my posts are grooming....
Don't ask me how that work's. Anyway, today and tommorow it's all about Spies! We're gonna talk about spy gadgets, pet's, and a typical spy's life. Now today's gadget is REVERSE PEEP HOLE VIEWER THINGAMIJIGGY.
This can see through the peep hole to see through someone else's house.
Now, you can finally check if your neighbor's planning world domination or not.
Second gadget of the day is THE BURGLAR BLASTER now technically
this isn't a spy gadget but it seemed pretty cool so I had to add it in the list. This gadget sprays pepper spray in the burgulars eye, so when you get home you can see a hairy dude bending down, screaming like a girl and covering one eye with his hand. Hey, what do you know, a show with dinner.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Bermuda mystery!
Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted anything since like 3 hours, word of advice, NEVER EAT MORE THAN 10 BOWLS OF KIDNEY BEANS, your toilet will never forgive you.
Pretty freaky huh? This man says he went to through time travel but others say it's fake, what do you think really happened to him? We'll talk more about the Bermuda triangle next time.
Anyway,I am sure all of you have heard of the BERMUDA TRIANGLE.Well more and more people are getting confused on what's going on down there, more ships and planes are going missing there and no one is really sure what's happening. One guy said he went to time travel there, here's a video of him,
Pretty freaky huh? This man says he went to through time travel but others say it's fake, what do you think really happened to him? We'll talk more about the Bermuda triangle next time.
Uhhhh...mom? I think we're gonna need a bigger pooper scooper!
Well, the scientist's are at it again they're trying to recreate DINOSAURS. For the people who have seen Jurassic Park, you know what Iam talking about, for the people who haven't, you HAVE to get out more. Some people are saying that the scientist's can recreate dinosaurs in 10 years, others are saying 100. When I was searching the web I found out that that people think scientist's can do the task because they gave a chicken teeth. At first, I was like, ummm...... ok, great, you gave a chicken some teeth,big whoop, now give it a toothbrush. Then I found out that chicken's used to have teeth but they lost them to evolution many years ago. So they're is some hope of scientists recreating dinosaurs, but what I am worried about is how are people going to take care of them especially all that dodo that comes from them.Yea,poop. I mean, that's going to take a pretty big pooper scooper and an even bigger garbage bag, and don't even get me started on the smell!
People are also worried that the scientist's won't be able to contain the dinosaurs, and if they get out what are they gonna eat, definitely not your Grandma's blueberry pie!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
The Crazy Little Dot in Space's Updates
Well, the day's almost over and today's Super Moon hasn't shown any enviormental disaster so far, so that's good news. Some other good news is that Egypt's people voted freely today.
There is also going to be a survey question on the blog every 7 days for people to get their opinions noticed. After, the results of the survey I will write about them in the posts, so keep on answering those survey questions.
Blog ya later!
Guy tries to rob a gun store with a knife...(do I even have to say it ?)
ROBONAUT (sound's like robo not, ha ha,...iam an idiot)
Hey guys, now before you get any crazy ideas that the astronaut and the guy with the golden helmet stuck on his head are gonna start a wrestling match, they're not. I know, I was disappointed too. The golden helmet dude is actually a humanoid (human looking) robot made by NASA to go into space. It's mission is to become a permanent resident of the International Space Station. By, permanent it means that you guys won't be seeing him on sale or mowing your rich neighbors lawn. NASA has no intention of bringing him back to Earth. Now, I know what you're thinking "what's with the golden helmet?" and "what's for lunch?"... Actually that second one is just me.
uhhhhh......robonaut?
Maybe NASA got the golden helmet idea from this guy,
uhhhhh......robonaut?
Friday, March 18, 2011
IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE, IT'S SUPERMOON
No, I am not talking about a superhero, tommorow (March 19), there will be a Super Moon!Now, what is a Super Moon you ask? Well, to tell you the truth I really don't know! Just joking, a Super Moon is when the Moon is really close to the Earth, the Moon won't be so close so that you can walk up and touch it but it will be closer than usual and may cause some enviormental disasters...
You know maybe that was the reason for the tsunami or maybe I am just being stupid...........
I'd go with choice #2. Anyway, tommorow's post will be sure to,
25%-make you laugh
25%-amaze you
50%-make you want to hit me or give you 20 more reasons to think I am an idiot.
T'ill tommorow!
You know maybe that was the reason for the tsunami or maybe I am just being stupid...........
I'd go with choice #2. Anyway, tommorow's post will be sure to,
25%-make you laugh
25%-amaze you
50%-make you want to hit me or give you 20 more reasons to think I am an idiot.
T'ill tommorow!
JAPAN'S PROBLEMS GROWING (i didn't spell anything wrong this time!)
Well, the earthquake and tsunami are over but theire's a big worry if radiation from Japan's nuclear plant's will reach other places in the world. Scientist's are saying that harmfull radiation levels will not reach the U.S, but, hey, you never know.Now, this isn't the kinda radiation that will turn you into the incredible HULK, it's the kind that will leave you with a nasty headache to worse...
What do you think should happen about this new radiation crisis and do you think that harmfull levels could reach other countries like Canada?
Sweet Potato Murder (don't worry, you read it right)
So, I was searching on the web and I found this website that showed some stupid mistakes people made, they were pretty funny. Here's one.
$1,500 and $10,000 and TWO SWEET POTATOES to kill her husband.I can just imagine it when the murders were getting paid.
Wife:"I want you to kill my husband!"
Murderer:"Hmm...it's a pretty big deal, we need the right materials to do it, if you know what I mean"murderer winks.
Wife:"I'll give you all the money I have!"
Murder:"The money's fine but how about those delicious sweet potatoes"
Wife:"No! Please their all I have in the world! There always by my side and I love them!"
Murder:"So, what about your husband?"
Wife:"Who?!?"
Murder:"Forget about it, just give me the sweet potatoes!"murder snatches the sweet potatoes.
Wife:"YOU MONSTER!"
Murder:"I play a hard deal woman!"walk's away.
The husband's ghost probably haunts the wife. It would go something like this,
Husband' s Ghost:" Margret!(wife's name)"
Wife:"Rick(husband's name)...is...that..you?!?"
Husband' s Ghost: "Why did you want me killed MARGRET!"
Wife:" But... but I loved you dearly!"
Husband' s Ghost: "Uhhhh...yea...you gave the guy a couple of sweet potatoes to kill me. You thought I was worth 2 sweet potatoes?!?"
Wife:"How could you say such a thing!
The sweet potatoes were on sale!"
Husband' s Ghost: "....
Well, you can't argue with that logic!"
EVIL SWEET POTATOES
THE’RE UNRESISTABLE!
THE TERRAFUGIA-TRANSITION! (yea, I thought it was german to)
Hey guys, so this the official new post of THE CRAZY LITTLE BLUE DOT...that's weird I've never wrote "official" before.I feel so professional, even though I am some kid sitting in my pajamas eating a bag of chips. Anyway, I was talking to one of friends and he asked me if he could borrow $25 and I was like "yeah right, when flying cars are invented!"Now, I was pretty proud of my selff of that comeback, unfortunately he wasn't. So, my friend get's all red and says "If I prove to you that there are flying cars, you owe me $25 bucks".I still didn't believe him so I really didn't care.Well, he came to my house that evening and goes on Google and types Terrafugia-Transition, I thought he was writing German or something.Anyway, it turns out "Terrafugia-Transition" is a flying car!It can go on land, air, and sea!... OK, not the sea but land and air! I was pretty excited about this thing I mean it was a flying car!The Terrafugia-Transition was invented by a small American company.It's a two seater so Adult's forget about bringing your kids, unless......never mind.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Blog Reborn
Hey guys check out the new blog design! Isn't it sick!?! I put a new name, background, design template, pretty much everything. Tommorow's post will be pretty cool, just wait and find out.
Tell me what you think about the new design too, cause tommorow we put this blog in high gear!
JAPAN TSUNAMEE(uhh..did i spell that right?)
So it turn's out that i didn't get any views from my last post...Well that dosen't matter cause' i'm not writting about that today. Today, i am talking about the big crisis in Japan... yes, the big tsunami. I wanna have your thought's on what the country should do and what other countries should do to help. Just leave some comments and on my next post and we will talk about the ideas of other people.
P.S. I just learned how to add a picture!(yea, i know I am a idiot)
Monday, March 14, 2011
I had a blog?
Hey people, wuz up!!!!!!!!! I know i haven't posted anything on this blog since like forever but there's a story behind that.So, here goes, I was just surfing on the web one morning and decided to go on my Google account. I was looking around my account n' i saw this link saying "blogger", and I am like huh!?!?So, i click on this link and apparently i had a blog!Turn's out i made this blog when i was like 10, and i never cared about it since! Well, i started looking around my blog, and saw how many views were there. I was thinking to myself "man, i probably have like a gazillion views"and"i bet there's gonna be so many people following me" also "hey what do these " things mean?". So, when i looked at my views, it wasn't pretty. I only had one view and zero followers.Nada, zilch, bupkis.I was still happy cause' at least i had one view, and it turned out that view was me.............
Any-who, I am gonna start posting some stuff on this blog and hopefully it doesn't make me end up with 1 view. K'post ya l8r!
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